Wednesday, January 21, 2009

Back to Honduras and God's Mercy

+m

Happy 2009!

I have a lot going on in my heart and my head right now, so I'll try to be brief. I had an amazing break at home with my family. I really rested, had some yummy food, runs, and hot showers, saw a lot of a lot of people I love, and talked to others on the phone. The snow wasn't even that bad! I guess I can say that now that I'm out of it again...but really, I was so blessed by that month, even though sometimes it seemed like I was in a whole different world!

I came back to Honduras bracing myself to jump back into the craziness of life here. But I wanted to come back focused on adoring Christ and slowing down and not getting so overwhelmed and anxious. When I arrived at the Mission house after 2 days of travel and was asked to leave early the next morning for a dental brigade in the mountains, I said okay Lord...here we go on this adventure again!

It was a beautiful mission--I became a dental hygenist and translator for 3 days, which was, well, interesting and humbling. On our way home, after passing through the most perilous part of the trip from the mountain village to the first big town, it began to rain a little bit. About 20 minutes from home, we went around a curve a little fast and slammed into the back of a semi going the other direction. It was rather surreal, everything happened so quickly. All of a sudden I was in the back of a passerby's car with one of our missionaries who was unconscious and hardly breathing, begging Mary and Jesus to save his life and to get to the hospital before it was too late. Needless to say it was a little dramatic.

We got to the private hospital and he was still alive, and once he was in the room I realized that I was a bit out of it too, with some major neck pain. They checked me out, got some x-rays, and determined that nothing was fractured, only some neck trauma which should go away after a few weeks. Thank God the other two, after some more extensive testing, were all right. God was so merciful to us though..He really did arrange everything that day for the best. Everything could have been so much worse. We've been getting reports of other recent car accidents in the area, and out of 10 people involved in those, only one survived.

So even though I'm not exactly sure what God is saying through all of this, and I'm confused and a bit frustrated at my inability to do much...and how it is a bit of a setback for our community due to the cost and time and pain that surrounds the accident, I think His message rings clear...He loves me (and each of us), no matter what we do. There is nothing we can do to make Him love us more. And I believe He has a plan and purpose for my life and for the life of this mission. It sounds a little trite but I'm waking up grateful for the singing birds and the shining sun, and the yells from the kids in the neighborhood. There is a little more sweetness in all these things, and in remembering how good my life is and has been. I hope that it teaches me, when I'm back up and running again, to take joy in the little tasks of life instead of seeing them as obstacles to be checked off of a list.

I'm grateful for your prayers and your concern, I have definitely felt it and will continue to need it as I keep trying to stay close to Jesus right now. I've decided for now not to come home, as my symptoms are improving and everyone here is taking great care of me and my fellow missioners. My Dad has actually decided to come visit this weekend, just so that I can have his company and (in case I forgot) to tell me in person how much he and the rest of my family love me...and my Mom's cousin Lori is visiting as well. So please keep our mission in your prayers as we start this new year, full of things to do but also that we might be renewed in our way of being. I am confident that this time of purification means that God has great plans for this mission, if only we remain patient and trusting in Him!

All my love and prayers, MJ